А что скажут люди? Как преодолеть страх чужого мнения и наконец стать собой — страница notes из 15

Примечания

1

Cal Callahan, “Lauren Bay-Regula: Life as an Olympian, Mom, and Entrepreneur,” January 28, 2020, The Great Unlearn podcast, https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-great-unlearn/id1492460338?i=1000463898379.

2

When we say the greatest constrictor of human potential, we are acknowledging that the fear of getting killed, starvation, or losing your job are greater constrictors. This book is about the quality of life we live, not survival.

3

Scott Barry Kaufman, “Sailboat Metaphor,” https://scottbarrykaufman.com/sailboat-metaphor.

4

Michael Gervais, “How to Stop Worrying about What Other People Think of You,” hbr.org, May 2, 2019, https://hbr.org/2019/05/how-to-stop-worrying-about-what-other-people-think-of-you.

5

Lauren Regula, Instagram post, September 7, 2022.

6

Quoted and translated in Alexander Wheelock Thayer, The Life of Ludwig van Beethoven: Vol. 1 [1866], ed. Henry Edward Krehbiel, (New York: The Beethoven Association, 1921), 300.

7

Thayer, Life of Beethoven, 300.

8

Heiligenstadt Testament, a letter written by Beethoven to his brothers Carl and Johann on October 6, 1802, http://www.lvbeethoven.com/Bio/BiographyHeiligenstadtTestament.html.

9

Jan Swafford, Beethoven: Anguish and Triumph; A Biography (Boston: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2014), 428; H. C. Robbins Landon, Beethoven: A Documentary Story (New York: Macmillan, 1974), 210. Lichnowsky’s physician, Dr. Anton Weiser, tells the story of when Beethoven was offended by being asked to play the violin at a dinner.

10

Swafford, Beethoven, 21.

11

Swafford, Beethoven, 53.

12

Franz Wegeler and Ferdinand Ries, Beethoven Remembered: The Biographical Notes of Franz Wegeler and Ferdinand Ries (Salt Lake City, UT: Great River Books, 1987), 39.

13

Swafford, Beethoven, 98–99.

14

Swafford, Beethoven, 128. “Part of his gift was the raptus, that ability to withdraw into an inner world that took him beyond everything and everybody around him, and also took him beyond the legion of afflictions that assailed him. Improvising at the keyboard and otherwise, he found solitude even in company.”

15

Swafford, Beethoven, 98–99.

16

Heiligenstadt Testament letter.

17

David Ryback, Beethoven in Love (Andover, MA: Tiger Iron Press, 1996). Quote is from Beethoven in 1817.

Nicholas Cook, Beethoven: Symphony No. 9 (Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press, 1993).

18

Michael Gervais, Finding Mastery podcast, May 25, 2023.

19

This echoes a quote often attributed to Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl, but is of uncertain origins: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

20

Mark Leary, “Is It Time to Give Up on Self-Esteem?” The Society for Personality and Social Psychology, May 9, 2019, https://spsp.org/news-center/character-context-blog/it-time-give-self-esteem.

21

N. C. Larson et al., “Physiological Reactivity and Performance Outcomes under High Pressure in Golfers of Varied Skill Levels,” oral presentation to the World Scientific Congress of Golf, Phoenix, AZ, March 2012.

22

Thomas Hobbes, Leviathan, part 1, chapter 13, page 58.

23

Cannon, 1915; Eliot, 1999; Keith Oatley, Dacher Keltner, and Jennifer M. Jenkins, Understanding Emotions, 2nd. edition (Hoboken, NJ: Wiley-Blackwell Publishing, 2006).

24

Cannon, 1915; Saper, Lumsden & Richerson, 2013.

25

Cannon, 1915; Saper, Lumsden & Richerson, 2013.

26

Cannon, 1915; Saper, Lumsden & Richerson, 2013.

27

Marks, 1997.

28

Cannon, 1915, Saper, Lumsden & Richerson, 2013

29

Stephanie A. Maddox, Jakob Hartmann, Rachel A. Ross, and Kerry J. Ressler, “Deconstructing the Gestalt: Mechanisms of Fear, Threat, and Trauma Memory Encoding,” Neuron 102, no. 1 (2019): 60–74.

30

Joseph E. LeDoux, “Coming to Terms with Fear,” PNAS 111, no. 8 (2014): 2871–2878.

31

Josephine Germer, Evelyn Kahl, and Markus Fendt, “Memory Generalization after One-Trial Contextual Fear Conditioning: Effects of Sex and Neuropeptide S Receptor Deficiency,” Behavioural Brain Research 361, no. 1 (2019): 159–166; Kim Haesen, Tom Beckers, Frank Baeyens, and Bram Vervliet, “One-Trial Overshadowing: Evidence for Fast Specific Fear Learning in Humans,” Behaviour Research and Therapy 90 (2017): 16–24.

32

Roy F. Baumeister, Ellen Bratslavsky, Catrin Finkenauer, and Kathleen D. Vohs, “Bad Is Stronger Than Good,” Review of General Psychology 5, no. 4 (2001): 323–370.

33

Arun Asok, Eric R. Kandel, and Joseph B. Rayman, “The Neurobiology of Fear Generalization,” Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience 12 (2019).

34

David Watson and Ronald Friend, “Measurement of Social-Evaluative Anxiety,” Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology 33, no. 4 (1969): 448–457.

35

Brad Rock, quoted in David Fleming, “Before ‘The Last Dance,’ Scottie Pippen Delivered Six Words of Trash Talk That Changed NBA History,” ESPN, May 15, 2020, https://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/29166548/before-last-dance-scottie-pippen-delivered-six-words-trash-talk-changed-nba-history.

36

Nina Strohminger, Joshua Knobe, and George Newman, “The True Self: A Psychological Concept Distinct from the Self,” Association for Psychological Science 12, no. 4 (2017): 551–560.

37

Michael A. Hogg and Dominic Abrams, Social Identifications: A Social Psychology of Intergroup Relations and Group Processes (London: Routledge, 1998).

38

Fight Club, directed by David Fincher, 1999.

39

Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (New York, Boston: T. Y. Crowell & Co., 1893).

40

APA Dictionary of Psychology.

41

Paul Blake, “What’s in a Name? Your Link to the Past,” BBC, April 26, 2011, https://www.bbc.co.uk/history/familyhistory/get_started/surnames_01.shtml.

42

Zygmunt Bauman, “Identity in the Globalising World,” Social Anthropology 9, no. 2 (2001): 121–129; Anthony Giddens, The Consequences of Modernity(Stanford, CA: Stanford University Press, 1991).

43

Jeffrey J. Arnett, “The Psychology of Globalization,” American Psychologist 57, no. 10 (2002): 774–783.

44

Michael Lipka, “Why America’s ‘Nones’ Left Religion Behind,” Pew Research Center, August 24, 2016, https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2016/08/24/why-americas-nones-left-religion-behind/.

45

The ten-thousand-hour rule popularized by Malcom Gladwell does not accurately align with Anders Ericsson’s original research on developing expertise.

46

Nadia Shafique, Seema Gul, and Seemab Raseed, “Perfectionism and Perceived Stress: The Role of Fear of Negative Evaluation,” International Journal of Mental Health 46, no. 4 (2017): 312–326.

47

Conversation with Dr. Ben Houltberg, March 9, 2021.

48

Albert Bandura, Self-Efficacy: The Exercise of Control (New York: W.H. Freeman and Company, 1997), p. 3.

49

Michael Gervais, “Missy Franklin on Being a Champion in Victory and Defeat,” Finding Mastery podcast, December 4, 2019, https://podcasts.apple.com/kw/podcast/missy-franklin-on-being-a-champion-in-victory-and-defeat/id1025326955?i=1000458624052.

50

Benjamin W. Walker and Dan V. Caprar, “When Performance Gets Personal: Towards a Theory of Performance-Based Identity,” The Tavistock Institute 73, no. 8 (2019): 1077–1105.

51

Joseph Campbell, Reflections on the Art of Living: A Joseph Campbell Companion (New York: Harper Perennial, 1995).

52

Dan Gilbert, “The Psychology of Your Future Self,” TED talk, 2014, https://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_the_psychology_of_your_future_self.

53

Jordi Quoibach, Daniel T. Gilbert, and Timothy D. Wilson, “The End of History Illusion,” Science 339, no. 6115 (2013): 96–98.

54

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55

William James, “The Conscious Self,” in William James, The Principles of Psychology, vol. 1 (Boston: Harvard University Press, 1892).

56

Jennifer Crocker and Connie T. Wolfe, “Contingencies of Self-Worth,” Psychological Review 108, no. 3 (2001): 593–623.

57

Crocker and Wolfe, “Contingencies of Self-Worth.”

58

Jennifer Crocker, “The Costs of Seeking Self-Esteem,” Journal of Social Issues 58, no. 3 (2002): 597–615.

59

Crocker, “The Costs of Seeking Self-Esteem.”

60

Charles S. Carver and Michael F. Scheier, On the Self-Regulation of Behavior (Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press, 1998); Jennifer Crocker and Lora E. Park, “Seeking Self-Esteem: Construction, Maintenance, and Protection of Self-Worth,” University of Michigan working paper, January 1, 2003.

61

Roy F. Baumeister, Ellen Bratslavsky, Mark Muraven, and Dianne M. Tice, “Ego Depletion: Is the Active Self a Limited Resource?” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 74, no. 5 (1998): 1252–1265; Roy F. Baumeister, Brad J. Bushman, and W. Keith Campbell, “Self-Esteem, Narcissism, and Aggression: Does Violence Result from Low Self-Esteem or from Threatened Egotism?” Current Directions in Psychological Science 9, no. 1 (2000): 26–29; Michael H. Kernis and Stefanie B. Waschull, “The Interactive Roles of Stability and Level of Self-Esteem: Research and Theory,” in Mark P. Zanna (ed.), Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, vol. 27, (Cambridge, MA: Academic Press, 1995), p. 93–141.

62

Rick Hanson, Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Love, Happiness and Wisdom (Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2009).

63

Albert Bandura, Social Learning Theory (Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall, 1977).

64

Avi Assor, Guy Roth, and Edward L. Deci, “The Emotional Costs of Parents’ Conditional Regard: A Self-Determination Theory Analysis,” Journal of Personality 72, no. 1 (2004): 47–88.

65

Ece Mendi and Jale Eldeleklioğlu, “Parental Conditional Regard, Subjective Well-Being and Self-Esteem: The Mediating Role of Perfectionism,” Psychology 7, no. 10 (2016): 1276–1295.

66

Dare A. Baldwin and Louis J. Moses, “Early Understanding of Referential Intent and Attentional Focus: Evidence from Language and Emotion,” in Charlie Lewis and Peter Mitchell (eds.), Children’s Early Understanding of Mind: Origins and Development (Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, 1994), p.133–156; Richard M. Ryan, Edward L. Deci, and Wendy S. Grolnick, “Autonomy, Relatedness, and the Self: Their Relation to Development and Psychopathology,” in Dante Cicchetti and Donald J. Cohen (eds.), Developmental Psychopathology, Volume 1: Theory and Method (Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley and Sons, 1995), p. 618–665; Susan Harter, “Causes and Consequences of Low Self-Esteem in Children and Adolescents,” in Roy Baumeister (ed.) Self-Esteem: The Puzzle of Low Self-Regard (New York: Plenum Press, 1993), p. 87–116.

67

Tim Kasser, Richard M. Ryan, Charles E. Couchman, and Kennon M. Sheldon, “Materialistic Values: Their Causes and Consequences,” in Tim Kasser and Allen D. Kanner (eds.), Psychology and Consumer Culture: The Struggle for a Good Life in a Materialistic World (Washington, DC: American Psychological Association, 2004), p. 11–28.

68

Rory Sutherland, “Life Lessons from an Ad Man,” TED talk, 2008, https://www.ted.com/talks/rory_sutherland_life_lessons_from_an_ad_man.

69

Timothy D. Wilson et al., “Just Think: The Challenges of the Disengaged Mind,” Science 345, no. 6192 (2014): 75–77.

70

Not to be confused with Depeche Mode, an electronic music band from the 1980s.

71

Marcus Raichle interviewed by Svend Davanger, “The Brain’s Default Mode Network – What Does It Mean to Us?” The Meditation Blog, March 9, 2015, https://www.themeditationblog.com/the-brains-default-mode-network-what-does-it-mean-to-us/.

72

Randy L. Buckner, “The Serendipitous Discovery of the Brain’s Default Network,” Neuroimage 62 (2012): 1137–1147.

73

Marcus E. Raichle and Abraham Z. Snyder, “A Default Mode of Brain Function: A Brief History of an Evolving Idea,” Neuroimage 37 (2007): 1083–1090.

74

Raichle interview, “Brain’s Default Mode.”

75

Marcus E. Raichle and Debra A. Gusnard, “Appraising the Brain’s Energy Budget,” PNAS 99, no. 16 (2002): 10237–10239; Camila Pulido and Timothy A. Ryan, “Synaptic Vesicle Pools Are a Major Hidden Resting Metabolic Burden of Nerve Terminals,” Science Advances 7, no. 49 (2021).

76

Matthew A. Killingsworth and Daniel T. Gilbert, “A Wandering Mind Is an Unhappy Mind,” Science 330, no. 6006 (2010): 932.

77

Barbara Tomasino, Sara Fregona, Miran Skrap, and Franco Fabbro, “Meditation-Related Activations Are Modulated by the Practices Needed to Obtain It and by the Expertise: An ALE Meta-Analysis Study,” Human Neuroscience 6 (2012); Judson A. Brewer et al., “Meditation Experience Is Associated with Differences in Default Mode Network Activity and Connectivity,” PNAS 108, no. 50 (2011): 20254–20259.

78

Jon Kabat-Zinn, “Some Reflections on the Origins of MBSR, Skillful Means, and the Trouble with Maps,” Contemporary Buddhism 12, no. 1 (2011): 281–306.

79

Jon Kabat-Zinn, “Mindfulness-Based Interventions in Context: Past, Present, and Future,” Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice 10, no. 2 (2003): 144–156.

80

Thomas Gilovich, Victoria H. Medvec, and Kenneth Savitsky, “The Spotlight Effect in Social Judgment: An Egocentric Bias in Estimates of the Salience of One’s Own Actions and Appearance,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 78, no. 2 (2000): 211–222.

81

Gilovich, Medvec, and Savitsky, “Spotlight Effect in Social Judgment.”

82

Gilovich, Medvec, and Savitsky, “Spotlight Effect in Social Judgment.”

83

Thomas Gilovich, “Differential Construal and the False Consensus Effect,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 59, no. 4 (1990): 623–634.

84

Amos Tversky and Daniel Kahneman, “Judgment under Uncertainty: Heuristics and Biases,” Science 185, no. 4157 (1974): 1124–1131.

85

“Theory of Mind,” Harvard Medical School News and Research, January 27, 2021, https://hms.harvard.edu/news/theory-mind.

86

William Ickes, “Everyday Mind Reading Is Driven by Motives and Goals,” Psychological Inquiry 22, no. 3 (2011): 200–206.

87

Nicholas Epley, Mindwise: Why We Misunderstand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want (New York: Vintage, 2015).

88

Epley, Mindwise.

89

Belinda Luscombe, “10 Questions for Daniel Kahneman,” Time, November 28, 2011, https://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,2099712,00.html.

90

Tal Eyal, Mary Steffel, and Nicholas Epley, “Perspective Mistaking: Accurately Understanding the Mind of Another Requires Getting Perspective, Not Taking Perspective,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 114, no. 4 (2018): 547–571.

91

Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People (New York: Simon & Schuster, 2009).

92

Nicholas Epley, “We All Think We Know the People We Love. We’re All Deluded,” Invisibilia, NPR, March 22, 2018, https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/03/22/594023688/invisibilia-to-understand-another-s-mind-get-perspective-don-t-take-it.

93

V. S. Ramachandran, A Brief Tour of Human Consciousness (New York: Pi Press, 2004), 3.

94

Nicholas Epley, “We All Think We Know The People We Love. We’re All Deluded,” Invisibila (podcast), March 22, 2018, https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/03/22/594023688/invisibilia-to-understand-another-s-mind-get-perspective-don-t-take-it.

95

Erving Goffman, The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life (New York: Anchor Books, 1959).

96

Leo Benedictus, “#Thedress: ‘It’s Been Quite Stressful to Deal With It… We had a Falling-Out’,” Guardian, December 22, 2015, https://www.theguardian.com/fashion/2015/dec/22/thedress-internet-divided-cecilia-bleasdale-black-blue-white-gold.

97

“Optical Illusion: Dress Colour Debate Goes Global,” BBC News, February 27, 2015, https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-highlands-islands-31656935; Benedictus, “#Thedress”; Terrence McCoy, “The Inside Story of the ‘White Dress, Blue Dress’ Drama That Divided a Planet,” Washington Post, February 27, 2015, https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/02/27/the-inside-story-of-the-white-dress-blue-dress-drama-that-divided-a-nation/; Claudia Koerner, “The Dress Is Blue and Black, Says the Girl Who Saw It in Person,” BuzzFeed News, February 26, 2015, https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/claudiakoerner/the-dress-is-blue-and-black-says-the-girl-who-saw-it-in-pers.

98

Pascal Wallisch, “Illumination Assumptions Account for Individual Differences in the Perceptual Interpretation of a Profoundly Ambiguous Stimulus in the Color Domain: ‘The Dress’,” Journal of Vision 17, no. 4 (2017): 5; Christoph Witzel, Chris Racey, J. Kevin O’Regan, “The Most Reasonable Explanation of ‘The Dress’: Implicit Assumptions about Illumination,” Journal of Vision 17, no. 2 (2017): 1.

99

Chris Shelton, “Let’s Get into Neuroscience with Dr. Jonas Kaplan,” Sensibly Speaking Podcast, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dPl6NKI1M4, 41:00.

100

Jonas Kaplan, “This Is How You Achieve Lasting Change by Rewiring Your Beliefs,” Impact Theory, November 25, 2021, https://impacttheory.com/episode/jonas-kaplan/.

101

Christopher Chabris and Daniel Simons, The Invisible Gorilla: And Other Ways Our Intuitions Deceive Us (New York: Crown Publishers, 2011).

102

James Alcock, Belief: What It Means to Believe and Why Our Convictions Are So Compelling (Amherst, NY: Prometheus Books, 2018).

103

Joshua Klayman and Young-won Ha, “Confirmation, Disconfirmation, and Information in Hypothesis Testing,” Psychological Review 94, no. 2 (1987): 211–228.

104

Richard E. Nisbett and Timothy D. Wilson, “Telling More Than We Can Know: Verbal Reports on Mental Processes,” Psychological Review 84, no. 3 (1977): 231–259.

105

Francis Bacon, The New Organon, or True Directions Concerning the Interpretation of Nature, 1620.

106

Drake Baer, “Kahneman: Your Cognitive Biases Act Like Optical Illusions,” New York magazine, January 13, 2017, https://www.thecut.com/2017/01/kahneman-biases-act-like-optical-illusions.html.

107

Baer, “Kahneman.”

108

Jeff Pearlman, Love Me, Hate Me: Barry Bonds and the Making of an Antihero (New York: HarperCollins: 2006); Jeff Pearlman, “For Bonds, Great Wasn’t Good Enough,” ESPN, March 14, 2006, https://www.espn.com/mlb/news/story?id=2368395.

109

A. W. Tucker, “The Mathematics of Tucker: A Sampler,” The Two-Year College Mathematics Journal 14, no. 3 (1983): 228–232.

110

Varda Liberman, Steven M. Samuels, and Lee Ross, “The Name of the Game: Predictive Power of Reputations versus Situational Labels in Determining Prisoner’s Dilemma Game Moves,” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 30, no. 9 (2004): 1175–1185.

111

Matthew Lieberman, “The Social Brain and the Workplace,” Talks at Google, February 4, 2019, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7UR9JwQEYk.

112

Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America, Volume II, translated by Henry Reeve, 1840.

113

Mark Manson, The Need to Always Prove Yourself in America.

114

Richard Schiffman, “We Need to Relearn That We’re a Part of Nature, Not Separate from It,” billmoyers.com, March 2, 2015.

115

Scott Galloway, “The Myth – and Liability – of America’s Obsession with Rugged Individualism,” Marker, March 15, 2021.

116

Roy F. Baumeister and Mark R. Leary, “The Need to Belong: Desire for Interpersonal Attachments as a Fundamental Human Motivation,” Psychological Bulletin 117, no. 3 (1995): 497–529.

117

Baumeister and Leary, “The Need to Belong.”

118

Jonathan White, Talking on the Water: Conversations about Nature and Creativity (San Antonio, TX: Trinity University Press, 2016).

119

Charles G. Lord, Lee Ross, and Mark R. Lepper, “Biased Assimilation and Attitude Polarization: The Effects of Prior Theories on Subsequently Considered Evidence,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 37, no. 11 (1979): 2098–2109.

120

Jonas T. Kaplan, Sarah I. Gimbel, and Sam Harris, “Neural Correlates of Maintaining One’s Political Beliefs in the Face of Counterevidence,” Scientific Reports 6 (2016): 39589.

121

Brian Resnick, “A New Brain Study Sheds Light on Why It Can Be So Hard to Change Someone’s Political Beliefs,” Vox, January 23, 2017, https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2016/12/28/14088992/brain-study-change-minds.

122

Jacqueline Howard, “This Is Why You Get Worked Up about Politics, According to Science,” CNN, January 3, 2017, https://www.cnn.com/2017/01/03/health/political-beliefs-brain/index.html.

123

Valerie Curtis, Mícheál de Barra, and Robert Aunger, “Disgust as an Adaptive System for Disease Avoidance Behaviour,” Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B 366, no. 1563 (2011): 389–401.

124

Erik Erikson, The Life Cycle Completed (New York: W. W. Norton, 1982), 112.

125

Daniel Kahneman et al., “A Survey Method for Characterizing Daily Life Experience: The Day Reconstruction Method,” Science 306, no. 5702 (2004): 1776–1780; Daniel Kahneman et al., “The Day Reconstruction Method (DRM): Instrument Documentation,” July 2004, https://dornsife.usc.edu/assets/sites/780/docs/drm_documentation_july_2004.pdf.

126

Steve Jobs, Commencement Address, Stanford University, June 12, 2005, https://news.stanford.edu/2005/06/14/jobs-061505/.

127

Seneca, On the Shortness of Life.

128

Eugene Kim, “‘One Day, Amazon Will Fail’ but Our Job Is to Delay It as Long as Possible,” CNBC, November 15, 2018.